Happy Anniversary

Today, I blow an imaginary candle on a make-believe anniversary cake. It was exactly a year ago that I bade goodbye to the corporate setting and ventured full-time into the world of the academe. It was a big step for me. One that was borne out of several years, not months, of discerning. It was not an easy decision to make. 

Although it was clear as midday sun to me that I had a passion for teaching, what I found hazy was what was to become of me and my plans in life as soon as I take a different route.  When I was still in the industry, I had my plans laid out per year. I was calculating about how much I needed to earn and save for my life projects. I have plotted the target years that I was to own a house, a new car, and everything else. You see, I have always mostly been like that --- calculating and forward-looking. I felt safe and content that everything was going according to my plans.

But as ironic as it may sound, behind that contentment and feeling of safety was a gnawing realization that something was missing. I was no longer challenging myself. And I have been turning my back for the longest time to a dream that I've had way back in college.

So there I was a year ago. I was caught in a maelstrom of emotions and conflicting  options that I needed to decide on. Practicality or Passion? I know it could never be reduced to these two words but I had to put labels on them at that time. In the midst of this dilemma, the universe had been kind enough to whisper its words of advise through a book I happen to have been reading by then.

We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.

                                                                                        --- Joseph Campbell

And so I made the decision to teach. It wasn't an overnight thing. This consumed restless nights and uneasy weekends. But I made the decision.  I told my bosses that it was time for me to go. I told myself that if indeed I was making the wrong decision, I might as well make it earlier in my career. 

So where am I now? Here at my desk thinking of what a roller coaster ride it has been --- with its downs and (more) ups.  It is impossible for a roller coaster not to have both. And that is exactly what makes it an adventure. Honestly, there are times when I miss my old work, the office mates, and the comforts that come with the pay. But of course, I have appreciated the new work, more free time, new colleagues, teaching students, my intellectual growth, and a sense of fulfilment. And it has been a good adventure. Good enough that I have shied away from industry job offers. Good enough that I am willing to give it a semester or two more before I make another decision of whether I'll go back to the corporate world or not. Good enough that I will do everything I can to make this work.

  

Disclaimer:  ;O)

I am for people finding their dreams and doing what they are passionate about. But I am not saying that you take my route. I am not advocating that people leave the jobs they find dull and boring and search for their passion. I mean, yes they should. But only when they are ready. And not to follow it blindly and without a backup plan. I am just telling my story as that is the purpose why I set up this blog over two years ago. Not to tell you what's right or wrong. But to simply tell a story and my random thoughts.

Leaving you with this powerful song from Switchfoot.